innocent bystander //a weblog

Detail of original by glockgal.  Click on image to see her work!

Saturday, June 10, 2000

4:57 PM: 

trent likes the licky-licky!!! i came to this stunning revelation while reading an article on radiospy.

looking around on the nin site... so my sister and i went to the concert in anaheim tuesday. but of course we get there late. we get there just as a perfect circle are finishing their set. so i didn't know until just now, by looking around the site, that they were playing aphex twin before the concert. see, this is why i am just convinced that trent is so godly. he likes everything i like! i mean, i think aphex twin is a total genius. total! genius!!!

i'm sorry, it's too hot for me to be any more coherent right now. not to leave you guessing, i live in los angeles.

Thursday, June 08, 2000

9:38 AM: 

i like being pale. people always said that i was too pale, but i enjoy being white as a sheet all year long. so i am wearing a long-sleeved black top today, and i'm looking down at my hands sticking out of the sleeves, and i'm disappointed that the afternoon i spent at an outdoors jazz festival has reduced the contrast between shirt and skin. dammit...

Tuesday, June 06, 2000

1:33 AM: 

she was a january girl
she never let on how insane it was
in that tiny, kinda scary house
by the woods, by the woods, by the woods
by the woods

Monday, June 05, 2000

11:08 AM: 

i have found a few things lately... check out low pass industries for h4x0r w4rz, a really funny send-up/reminiscence of the good ol' bbs-ing days of p/h/a/c/v and tradewars. find software exploits so you can hack shells or rock other hackers and steal their shells. fortify yourself with a firewall and bandwidth. your end objective is pr0n... i have 4 gigs so far. sigh. i miss those days. also check out backflip for a really cool remote bookmarking service. the first good one that i have seen. and god knows that i've seen a lot of bad ones.

10:43 AM: 

hee hee! both my bosses are out and i am shirking work until 11:30 at the least. i made a quick trip over to peter h.'s weblog... (peter i'm sorry i haven't written you back. i am lagging on all my correspondence.) peter memorialized a car crash that he saw. he's really good at this drawing thing. someone (ok, me) would feel like saying, upon seeing his work, that he has quite a talent and should really be recognized, perhaps with a high-paying and prestigious job, but someone could also remember that the comic book industry is just really not one you want to break into. not if you like things like food, a house, clothes...

what a horrifying weekend. my father has decided, willy-nilly (or, will-he or nil-he, as neil gaiman would put it), to sell the family home and split up the family members' living arrangements among our other two properties. it's really an attack on my brother. i'm moved out. one of my sisters lives in the dorms at college. he could move out at the drop of a hat-- he just hasn't gotten around to it yet. the only one this will hurt is my youngest sister. she's too young to move out. and, moving out for any other reason than going to college is sacrilege/blasphemy/disaster in a chinese family. she is upset. i don't know how upset. it's been years since things like this have happened in my family. but i remember how i felt when they happened to me. and they nearly destroyed me.

i am so scared for her.

and in the middle of it all, i thought, "this is going to cost me $90." because i am going to have to see my therapist about this. i know it sounds really l.a. but i can't wait until our next appointment. i didn't know, last night, how i was going to show up to work and make it through the day. i don't know how i'm going to put on a smiley face and pretend like everything's normal to the world when i feel like curling up in my apartment and not seeing anyone for a month. i don't know, if after talking to her tonight, i will be any more able to. but it is better than doing nothing.


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glockgal (lj)
mr. blank
william gibson
neil gaiman
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